We've all complained that the stores, malls and on-line merchants have over-commercialized Christmas. This includes presenting Christmas displays in August (yes, August!), opening stores on Thanksgiving Day or in the wee hours of "Black Friday" (I hope you boycotted those establishments), and generally beating up families if they don't spend a small fortune on gifts.
Allow me to make some suggestions to simplify Christmas.
The Christian season of Advent helps us to focus on "the reason for the season," namely, the birth of Jesus the Christ. Just as it takes 40 days of lent to prepare for Easter (and 50 days to celebrate the Paschal Mystery), the Christian way is to take four weeks to prepare for the Nativity of Our Lord, and then savor the meaning of his birth over several more.
In this regard, try to incorporate Christian symbols in every Advent and Christmas custom. Prepare for the feast with the saints of Advent (such as St. Nicholas, Our Lady of Guadalupe, St. Juan Diego, and St. John the Baptist, as well as Hebrew prophets Isaiah and Micah). Christmas cards are best with images of Bethlehem, or the Magi, or the Christ Child (not snowy villages, Santa Claus, skaters on frozen ponds, or red-nosed Rudolph). Place a Navitity scene near or underneath the Christmas tree. Incorporate prayer, biblical readings of the Christmas story from Matthew and Luke, and religious songs into dinners and parties.
A manual for a simpler season, Unplug the Christmas Machine, by Jo Robinson and Jean Coppock Staeheli, suggests four basic themes: relaxed and loving time with the family; realistic expectations on gifts; an evenly paced holiday with time for events and time for rest; and reliable family traditions. They say that the key to all these is planning. So that the "Christmas machine" doesn't steamroll you, it is important to plan.
Planning includes setting limits on how much money and how many gifts you will give; deciding which parties to attend and which to decline with regrets; making a conscious decision to substitute homemade products (such as cards or baked cookies), or a gift of friendship time, instead of expensive or useless obligatory gifts. Planning includes saying "no" once you've met your budgeted amount for gifts.
Another help to simplify Christmas is to lower expectations. Repeat to yourself that there is no such thing as "a perfect family" or "a perfect Christmas party." It's ok if your home doesn't look like Martha Stewart's mansion. Realize that people will disappoint us and that most people don't change. Accept that you cannot be everywhere, do everything, and please everyone. Appreciate what you do have, who does love you--and don't worry about what you don't have.
A specific Christmas theme dear to me which I like to harp on is to give to those who cannot repay you. One year instead of giving gifts to friends I made donations in their name to western Pennsylvania charities (Catholic Charities, Jubilee Soup Kitchen, Auberle Home, McGuire Memorial, Sisters Place). Another year I "gave" them sheep, goats, llamas, water buffaloes and flocks of chicks through Heifer International, which tries to address poverty, hunger and access to water around the world. ( www.heifer.org ) Purchase gifts or cards from not-for-profits which benefits poor artisans from around the world (such as UNICEF or Ten Thousand Villages). I have received similar gifts, and felt the warmth of friendship through these contributions to the needy.
A special gift is the gift of down time to yourself. Allow yourself and your family circle moments to relax, pray, and celebrate the simple joy of friendship and love. A lovely Catholic tradition is to go to one daily Mass each week during Advent. One evening turn the tv off and read slowly the Christmas stories in Matthew or Luke (and see the big differences in each evangelist's presentation). Plan to make this Advent and Christmas simpler and more joy-filled.
No comments:
Post a Comment